[His voice is stiff and formal, in the way only chronic-workaholics with no personal-lives can manage.]

Mr. Bradbury, I'm calling to express my interest in joining the security team you are currently forming. My name is Red Alert, or "Redford Alton" if you would prefer to refer to me by my human-alias. I have considerable experience in the security field, which we can discuss more in-depth at your earliest convenience.